It's funny how my schedule has a tendency to go from dead boring to a veritable social freeway. I have a date tonight. An interesting fellow has asked me out for coffee and I accepted on a whim... historically I at least chat for a few minutes before I'll agree to such a thing. This guy seemed worth a shot though: his OKC profile was interesting, and the site's algorithm did gave us a pretty high match. I think there's something to be said for that mathimatical matching mumbo jumbo, every person I've met with a <90 match percent has become someone I want to spend significant time with.
Anyway, I digress... I was talking about my upcoming schedule. In addition to tonight's date, I have two more dates this week. Tomorrow is a 'co-date' with Jute and Lane and Friday Jute and I are going to spend some special time together. Beyond dates, I have a Full Moon event to attend, plus classes, meetings and a vet visit for my four legged friends too.
Even though it keeps me super busy sometimes, I really enjoy having an active dating life. I recommend it to everyone, even my monogamous friends. (After all you CAN date your partner no longer how long you've been together.) Going out and having fun keeps life from getting stale. Who wants to stay home and watch TV when you could go out and experience the world instead?
Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Happy New Year
Well it's official. Welcome to 2012.
I had an uneventful evening - stayed home and read a book. A few minutes to midnight Jute asked if we should have a traditional midnight kiss. I nonchalantly agreed, and we came together for a short make out session. After the clocks clicked over we broke away again. He returned to playing Zelda (he received an NES system for the holidays) and I returned to my computer. I texted a *snuggle kiss* to Raven and was a little sad that I couldn't kiss him in person.
New Years Day. (sigh) Exactly one year ago today, Jute and I visited Star and Carter for dinner. We hardly knew each other at the time. Star and I had only been flirting for a couple months, and had only kissed once. We had met each other's husbands, but not socialized with them at all. The guys were just barely acquaintances. The plan for the evening was chatting and board games, but somehow instead we ended up having a crazy, beautiful, BDSM orgy.
I'd have to say Star was the one who initiated it. After a few drinks she suggested we play a new card game, and this time she suggested a 'strip' version. We exchanged glances, tittered, and then all agreed that could be fun. Shortly thereafter we were suitably nude enough that Star further suggested that Carter show off his rope skills, using me as a bunny. I was nervous, but agreed. As he first began to tie me I experienced a bit of faintness. When I admitted this sensation, he calmly lowered me into a kitchen chair, loosened the bonds and checked my pulses. His confidence and calm inspired an immediate wave of relief in me. I was safe with him. That moment was when my feelings for him began to turn.
Star and Jute meanwhile had started out watching the bondage session, but somewhere along the line she had shared with him that she was very curious as to what it felt like to suck an un-cut cock. She asked permission to experience his, and he was happy to oblige.
By the time Carter was ready to tie me to the table, Jute and Star were highly aroused. The three of them kissed, stroked and licked me all over, and Carter's probing fingers caused me to squirt for the first time in my life. Jute was facinated and wanted to learn how to do the same. Carter demonstrated on me for a bit, before I was untied and it was Star's turn to gush all over the hardwood.
Later we took the party to their kingsize bed, and spent a few hours alternately fucking and then making love. The energy between us was indescribable. We awoke the next morning in a happy tangle of limbs. We were amazed at having discovered this intimate connection with each other. We felt as if we had all aligned just perfectly.
We were ready for a perfect new year. And what a year it was... what a year.
I had an uneventful evening - stayed home and read a book. A few minutes to midnight Jute asked if we should have a traditional midnight kiss. I nonchalantly agreed, and we came together for a short make out session. After the clocks clicked over we broke away again. He returned to playing Zelda (he received an NES system for the holidays) and I returned to my computer. I texted a *snuggle kiss* to Raven and was a little sad that I couldn't kiss him in person.
New Years Day. (sigh) Exactly one year ago today, Jute and I visited Star and Carter for dinner. We hardly knew each other at the time. Star and I had only been flirting for a couple months, and had only kissed once. We had met each other's husbands, but not socialized with them at all. The guys were just barely acquaintances. The plan for the evening was chatting and board games, but somehow instead we ended up having a crazy, beautiful, BDSM orgy.
I'd have to say Star was the one who initiated it. After a few drinks she suggested we play a new card game, and this time she suggested a 'strip' version. We exchanged glances, tittered, and then all agreed that could be fun. Shortly thereafter we were suitably nude enough that Star further suggested that Carter show off his rope skills, using me as a bunny. I was nervous, but agreed. As he first began to tie me I experienced a bit of faintness. When I admitted this sensation, he calmly lowered me into a kitchen chair, loosened the bonds and checked my pulses. His confidence and calm inspired an immediate wave of relief in me. I was safe with him. That moment was when my feelings for him began to turn.
Star and Jute meanwhile had started out watching the bondage session, but somewhere along the line she had shared with him that she was very curious as to what it felt like to suck an un-cut cock. She asked permission to experience his, and he was happy to oblige.
By the time Carter was ready to tie me to the table, Jute and Star were highly aroused. The three of them kissed, stroked and licked me all over, and Carter's probing fingers caused me to squirt for the first time in my life. Jute was facinated and wanted to learn how to do the same. Carter demonstrated on me for a bit, before I was untied and it was Star's turn to gush all over the hardwood.
Later we took the party to their kingsize bed, and spent a few hours alternately fucking and then making love. The energy between us was indescribable. We awoke the next morning in a happy tangle of limbs. We were amazed at having discovered this intimate connection with each other. We felt as if we had all aligned just perfectly.
We were ready for a perfect new year. And what a year it was... what a year.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
New Girl
Jute had a new partner come over for dinner tonight. He met Lane a couple weeks ago through craigslist.
Jute is much different than I in how he views sex with strangers. He has no qualms about having a purely carnal encounter. In fact, the idea turns him on. From a risk management standpoint I'm not comfortable with him having one night stands, so our negotiated boundary has been that he only meets people for sex if they have the potential to become a repeat partner. Before he met Lane he was looking for a new 'fuck buddy' because the woman he was been seeing for that had moved out of state. I never met that woman because there was never an emotional connection; thus I was nonplussed about her existence, and he didn't feel the desire to introduce her to the rest of his life, and she wasn't interested in being part of it either.
Lane was a different experience for him. He hadn't expected anything more than the physical connection, but upon meeting her he was happily surprised that she was someone he was genuinely interested in befriending and dating. I've been really happy for him. Not only am I excited for him to have this beautiful potential relationship developing, but I'm also happy because it seemed like his interest in Lane was another step in getting past the hurt he's harbored since losing Star.
I enjoyed meeting Lane. She's not a person I would have noticed on my own, but I felt pretty comfortable hanging out with her and could see us getting to be friends eventually. I'm sure Jute would love for us to become more - poor guy - he really misses having group sex. However I'm hesitant to head in that direction. Firstly because I'm not into sex with people I've just met, but also I'm not a big fan of group sex. I've found that having sex with two or more partners is too complicated emotionally for me. I feel inadequate when it comes to balancing the attention given to each person, and spend so much of the time focused on how everyone else is feeling in a given moment that I don't relax and enjoy the process.
I'm not knocking the idea of group sex in general. It just hasn't worked as well for me. I'd be interested in trying again someday. But someday in the future. I'm glad it wasn't tonight.
Jute is much different than I in how he views sex with strangers. He has no qualms about having a purely carnal encounter. In fact, the idea turns him on. From a risk management standpoint I'm not comfortable with him having one night stands, so our negotiated boundary has been that he only meets people for sex if they have the potential to become a repeat partner. Before he met Lane he was looking for a new 'fuck buddy' because the woman he was been seeing for that had moved out of state. I never met that woman because there was never an emotional connection; thus I was nonplussed about her existence, and he didn't feel the desire to introduce her to the rest of his life, and she wasn't interested in being part of it either.
Lane was a different experience for him. He hadn't expected anything more than the physical connection, but upon meeting her he was happily surprised that she was someone he was genuinely interested in befriending and dating. I've been really happy for him. Not only am I excited for him to have this beautiful potential relationship developing, but I'm also happy because it seemed like his interest in Lane was another step in getting past the hurt he's harbored since losing Star.
I enjoyed meeting Lane. She's not a person I would have noticed on my own, but I felt pretty comfortable hanging out with her and could see us getting to be friends eventually. I'm sure Jute would love for us to become more - poor guy - he really misses having group sex. However I'm hesitant to head in that direction. Firstly because I'm not into sex with people I've just met, but also I'm not a big fan of group sex. I've found that having sex with two or more partners is too complicated emotionally for me. I feel inadequate when it comes to balancing the attention given to each person, and spend so much of the time focused on how everyone else is feeling in a given moment that I don't relax and enjoy the process.
I'm not knocking the idea of group sex in general. It just hasn't worked as well for me. I'd be interested in trying again someday. But someday in the future. I'm glad it wasn't tonight.
Monday, December 26, 2011
New Relationship Energy
NRE. New Relationship Energy. For the uninitiated, it's what many poly folks call the 'walking on clouds' feeling you get when you've just started seeing someone new and you think about them every five minutes. It's a great feeling, makes everything in the world seem a little bit brighter.
Even though I've known him for close to a year now, I feel like over the holidays we've opened some new doors in our relationship. I'm finding myself feeling that special obsession. Memories of his kisses, and imaginings about more of them keep popping up and then I'll give a little involuntary sigh of pleasure. Mmm. Of course, today we shared a racy 'texting's-too-difficult-better-use-the-phone' call this afternoon, which left us both in a state of post orgasmic bliss. So that just gives me so much more to sigh about.
NRE is wonderful, but I need to be considerate of a few other people in the equation, namely Jute and Kit. Jute is easier for me, afterall he's my husband. I have a better understanding of his worldview and what's going to trigger his insecurities than Kit. I also have pretty much constant access to him to monitor his well being. Kit on the other hand is slightly an enigma. As far as I can tell she and I get along wonderfully, she's easy to converse with and I consider her a friend. However I just plain don't know her very deeply and therefore can't feel as secure about her perspective as I would like to feel. I wonder if she and Raven's relationship is really as secure as it seems... perhaps only because that's a big part of what burned me with Star and Carter.
I also wonder how she feels about me. Is she only interested in friendship or is there maybe more than that. Personally it's harder for me to tell if a woman is interested in me than a man is. Maybe that's just caused by my lack of experience with the ladies, or maybe it has to do with my perception of what female friendship looks like versus male friendship. It seems like there's more overlap between what is flirting and what's 'just-friends' when I'm interacting with a woman. I'm not sure how I feel about developing a physical or romantic connection with Kit either. That has more to do with my feelings about dating couples in general than with Kit specifically though. She is a very attractive woman with a great personality. If only I wasn't already becoming involved with her boyfriend.
Jute tends to look at things differently than me. He thinks a "V" relationship is inherently less stable than a equilateral triad. I don't know what to think about that though. I think I'll leave that as food for thought for another day.
Even though I've known him for close to a year now, I feel like over the holidays we've opened some new doors in our relationship. I'm finding myself feeling that special obsession. Memories of his kisses, and imaginings about more of them keep popping up and then I'll give a little involuntary sigh of pleasure. Mmm. Of course, today we shared a racy 'texting's-too-difficult-better-use-the-phone' call this afternoon, which left us both in a state of post orgasmic bliss. So that just gives me so much more to sigh about.
NRE is wonderful, but I need to be considerate of a few other people in the equation, namely Jute and Kit. Jute is easier for me, afterall he's my husband. I have a better understanding of his worldview and what's going to trigger his insecurities than Kit. I also have pretty much constant access to him to monitor his well being. Kit on the other hand is slightly an enigma. As far as I can tell she and I get along wonderfully, she's easy to converse with and I consider her a friend. However I just plain don't know her very deeply and therefore can't feel as secure about her perspective as I would like to feel. I wonder if she and Raven's relationship is really as secure as it seems... perhaps only because that's a big part of what burned me with Star and Carter.
I also wonder how she feels about me. Is she only interested in friendship or is there maybe more than that. Personally it's harder for me to tell if a woman is interested in me than a man is. Maybe that's just caused by my lack of experience with the ladies, or maybe it has to do with my perception of what female friendship looks like versus male friendship. It seems like there's more overlap between what is flirting and what's 'just-friends' when I'm interacting with a woman. I'm not sure how I feel about developing a physical or romantic connection with Kit either. That has more to do with my feelings about dating couples in general than with Kit specifically though. She is a very attractive woman with a great personality. If only I wasn't already becoming involved with her boyfriend.
Jute tends to look at things differently than me. He thinks a "V" relationship is inherently less stable than a equilateral triad. I don't know what to think about that though. I think I'll leave that as food for thought for another day.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Kisses
This won't start out making much sense, because I don't want to start from the beginning. I promise: the back story will come out in time. For now I just don't want to focus on that. I want to talk about kisses.
Raven kissed me last night. Our first kisses. I wondered if he was going to, after all the dare was at least four months ago. It turned out he was just as nervous-eager as I was to finally press close and touch soft sweet lips. It was so comfortable and happy, like a homecoming. He remembered the things I'd told him too, how I melt when my hair is petted and how my knees get weak when my neck is nibbled. He turned me around and held me as we observed the stars, his hands in my pockets, his chin on the top of my head. So sweet, so brief, I'm already longing for more.
It's frustrating and wonderful that he lives in my hometown. On the one hand it's so long between visits. On the other hand he's at least somewhere I visit regularly. I wish I'd found him when I lived there, but maybe I didn't because I just wasn't ready for him. He's been part of the process. He was the friend I could talk to about all the crazy Star and Carter brought into my life and my marriage. The one who kept reminding me to care for myself. Every time I thought the crazy drama or my internal struggles would push him away he stayed steadfast. What a wonderful man and friend he is. It's so important for me to protect the friendship I have in him because I having him in my life has made it richer.
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